Come…Have a Look…

I’m sharing a sample here of one of the pieces I have in Emergence. I wonder, do you see yourself?

It is our hope that, by sharing the stories of many gifted and 2E women, you might find your reflection in a place or two. It is our belief that you will probably find many parts of yourself in many pieces, because this is the feedback that we’ve gotten so far.

Much of my life, I thought I wasn’t a very critical thinker. I believed I was, in fact, quite mushy, because I didn’t see things in black and white. Sometimes it wasn’t even gray that I saw but both black and white in their unique hues. I marveled at people who were very definitive in their opinions, and assumed I just wasn’t as knowledgeable as them. I often felt, well, wrong.

Then I came across an article by Susan Daniels called “A Kaleidoscopic View of Creativity: Reflections on the Creative Self,” and so many things fell into place. In particular, I was struck by Daniels’ description of the creatively gifted person often being characterized by a series of seeming contradictions. However, she then went on to explain how this kind of non-linear openness is essential to creative inspiration. I suddenly felt much less wrong and a lot more like myself. This concept has held its value and impact for me over many years, and it was one of the seeds that became “My Dichotomous Being.”

Mirroring by someone who you can see beauty and strength and appeal in can be incredibly satisfying and healing. It can be perspective shifting. I feel there are lots of these opportunities in Emergence. If you’ve read any of the book and want to share your impressions, we’d find that invaluable. You can leave a comment here or send me a private message. If you haven’t purchased the book but are interested, you can use this link to check it out: http://www.giftedmindfulness.com/shop

Also, be on the lookout very soon for an invitation to a gathering celebrating the release of Emergence.

And now, my offering…

My Dichotomous Being. Kim Bielmann

I’m complicated.

I am intensely intellectual, but deeply emotional.

I am reserved but warm and welcoming.

I need to understand the logic, but I am guided by intuition.

I am undeniably self-sufficient but extremely vulnerable.

I don’t care what people think of me, but it’s hard for me to shake criticism and broken connections.

I am highly perceptive of subtle incongruencies in my environment, but I can be naïve about the intentions of the people I let close to me.

I will protect a stranger on the street who is being mistreated, but I avoid conflict with people I know intimately.

I want to be invited to the party, but I don’t usually want to go.

I enjoy being in the midst of people, but I don’t want to be required to interact with them.

I find solitude exhilarating, but I’ve spent my life searching for a safe community where I can be held.

I’m fiercely independent, but I long for someone to say, “Let me help you carry this for a while.”

I need space and time, but I thrive in deeply connected relationships.

I’m a sensual domestic, but I’m a feminist.

I’d rather spend money at the hardware store than on handbags and shoes, but I rarely leave the house without putting on lipstick.

I bristle at brands and trends, but I sometimes fantasize about being a normal girl.

I am all of this and all of that, and it’s not that complicated. When I allow it all, embrace and accept it, I become more compassionate toward myself and others. I am not either-or, I am all. It is the texture and the curiosity of me. When I allow this fulness to exist…. let it naturally flow, I see that I am actually quite skilled at navigating all of my depth and complexity.

All of the wonder that is me.

Always growing, always evolving and, sometimes, just being.

My big, bursting, beautiful Self.